Day 28 in the Big Abbott House…

Evening all, well look at this more posts closer to each other than a week apart, anyone would think I am getting a schedule and routine in place and have more time on my hands to write…  Now that all the parents have picked themselves off the floor from laughing so hard as they fail to believe that after a mere 4 weeks I have this parenting lark sussed!!

Firstly I have to say for the record, “buggy boards” are officially the worst invention on the planet!!  What are “buggy boards” well they are those annoying accessories for pushchairs that you attach so that while you push your toddler that their older sibling can stand on the back on a safe platform and basically be lazy!!  Well ok perhaps lazy is too strong a word, I can see why it is helpful to have the older sibling standing on the back because then you can go at the same pace and not lose the struggling sibling who is not walking at the required speed to get to school on time and if they don’t get a move on then there will be trouble.  Did that sound like the voice of recent experience??

Really my main gripe is not the invention or concept because I understand the need/gap in the market, we bought a nice new pushchair for the wee man and with that we bought this buggy board.  We were originally gifted a buggy (thanks M and J), very basic and for the first couple of weeks that was such a God send since wee man was really not coping with all the activities and moving around and getting really tired quickly so to have the buggy meant he could rest and enjoy.  Girly girl would stand on the rear truss and that was ok, but as you will know makes the buggy rear heavy.  The other main issue with the one we were gifted was the height and reach, even Yve struggled with her back stooping over and she is 8″ smaller than me so you can imagine the strain on mine.

Trip to the shops and a McLaren was purchased lovely red colour. <<<<<< Doesn’t she look a wee smasher, I love her.

Sorry I couldn’t resist I have been thinking about that all day, so lame I know but just a bit of fun.

Anyways as I was saying off to Mothercare, not so glamorous but far more practical when I went in and purchased a new Pushchair that won’t break our backs and at the same time bought a buggy board for girly girl to use properly.  Anyway we all love the concept and the fact that the pushchair has extending handles to allow tall me to walk properly and upright, oh no wait a minute that is until I use the Buggy Board.  Even though it says in the packaging etc that there is enough space to get your feet under while you walk, in practice that’s garbage!!  When the Buggy Board is not on and used, the new MacLaren pushchair is an absolute dream to use and wee man loves it.   When it is on, and girly girl is using it, that’s when it becomes really annoying and rear heavy and no I can’t walk properly with it on.  Needless to say I am developing a habit of ‘forgetting’ it, cough, cough.

Life in the Big Abbott house continues a pace and we have had another all out war spat the other day, on the back of doing something nice and trying to organise the possible birthday party.  It gets quite tricky when wee man has to be physically moved into the front seat and we sit in the car park for nigh on 25 minutes while girly girl screamed and attempted to deconstruct the car piece by piece.   I got seriously scratched, punched and kicked as well, wee man was not immune hence why he was in the front, and it didn’t stop on the way home either.  Seriously we are struggling to see a trigger point as we were advised in a recent meeting, see the trigger and cut it off at the pass…  helpful advice it is except when you struggle to actually see what is the trigger point.  It tends to be outbursts and have become quite violent outbursts, mainly I must say directed at me, but we also find wee man gets in the way just by being himself and antagonised by girly girl, so we try and remove everything possible that she can’t hit or scratch or attempt to break/remove/snap etc etc.  So now there is nothing in the back of the car, maps, gone; blinds for back windows, gone; vents for Honey when she is in the car, gone; box of chewing gum what sat quietly in the well behind the handbrake, gone; really the only thing that is in the back of the car is wee man and girly girl and their respective car seats and when all is not well only girly girl and her seat is there.  So no new car for us for a while until we see an end to the car wrecking stage.

You know what, I am really painting a very poor picture of my daughter here, also that I must have the most angelic son on the planet since I never seem to write about the struggle with him.  Well let me say, while most of the really big stuff is at the expense of Girly girl, wee man is not angelic, now that is a revelation.  I love my daughter and am so proud to be her father and wee man well he’s ma boy what can I say, I love him as well, that is no revelation.   Funny thing is with girly girl in the back screaming a pretence that her mouth was somehow hurt in the scuffle and was still squealing loudly most of the trip home, wee man fell asleep!!  We had to chuckle with that one, well what else do you do, your older sister is in the back crying foul and you think, she’s at it again, I’m tired, time for a nap 🙂

There was a point on the way home that I stretched my hand to the back seat where Yve was sat and held her hand, a gesture to say ‘I Love You’ and we are getting through this.  When we got home I locked Honey in the Conservatory, for her own protection, and then brought wee man in still sleeping and sat on the couch while girly girl who had begun to calm down made her way out of the car slowly and grudgingly into the house.  There was a moment when all was calm again, wee man, now snoring on my shoulder and girly girl at the dining table doing a craft of some kind and I just started crying, tears streaming down my face.  I watched my beautiful daughter just moments before screaming at us, scratching, destroying our car and stuff and now here sat at the table like nothing had ever happened quite content was my girly girl, oblivious to the disaster and mayhem that had just ensued.   At that moment I cried because the screaming had to be  part of  a lot of pain and anguish and stress and all sorts that even she didn’t know was there, to her it was probably so trivial so small and easily rectified and sorted but for the fact that she is where she is and has lost what she has lost and I just wanted to take it from her and make it all better, but I can’t, but I want to, but I can’t, so I cried…

They have both settled in really well and are getting there being part of this family, we are Mummy and Daddy of that there is no doubt we have been regularly called that since week 1.  Routines are beginning to form and we are recognising more and more the same patterns and working either our way round them or through them and unfortunately sometimes headlong into them, but with all we are getting there.   To be fair and we have to keep reminding ourselves of this, as of tonight it has been exactly 4 weeks to the day that they spent their first night sleeping in their beds upstairs in their own rooms.   We have achieved a lot and the kids are remarkably well adjusted and comfortable with Yve and I and how we are parenting them, so I should say we are doing all right Jack!

It’s 11.30pm I’m tired, I’ll write again soon.  Good night all xx